“To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before”

“To all the boys I’ve loved before. part one.
WE are not your mothers. You have been weaned from the breast of a woman for years yet you come to us wounded, and half filled with promises you can only keep half the time trying to suck the loss sense of self-dry, WE have become much too accustomed to sleepless nights and damp pillows, have become much too accustomed to waiting for our empty beds to be weighed down with the bodies of men heavy with a set and a hands of other women and

We, simply wanting to be loved, and to love ourselves unconditionally, Simply wanting the truth of whether you can really love us, or not to play, play scarlet letters in our chest; become adulteresses cheating ourselves out of what we truly deserve, willing to settle for less, willing to act like a little less than a goddess, willing to sleep with the enemy. Men too scared to stop acting like boys, thinking we can love away their scars, so we take the lashes of the insecurities they pour in us and lick our wounds in quiet mourning for the little girls that we lose by the minute.

Part two.
You’ve said you have a photographic memory.
But apparently, you forgot that honesty begins by being real with yourself and the ones you claim you love. The truth, cannot be hidden. what’s clouded and darkness will always come to light, my love, you should have known that claiming you saw my light so clearly and brightly. I guess shit happens. I just wish it wasn’t me. AND I guess, it’s so much better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, I know that’s some easy shit to say but i’m still gonna try to live by it, I’m still gonna try to put my faith to rest in it;

I will sleep on dry pillows now, in a bed big enough to love myself in, I will awake with these coming mornings with my eyes dry and shining full of the knowledge. I am priceless and worth nothing but honesty. I will remove the scarlet letters from my chest and take the hand of the little girl I used to be and say I’m sorry to her, I’m sorry for cheating you out of the joy YOU have always deserved. And I will wait, for a MAN to come along, that can give me the truth of how much he can really love me.“